March 2, 2012

I Don't Watch The News While You're Gone

I am lucky enough to be the sister of a mortuary affairs solider in the US Army. His job is to take care of his fellow fallen soldiers, get them prepared to be sent back home and in any moment of danger he is to be the first one responding to save lives. Currently he's stationed over in Afghanistan for the umpteenth time.

He enrolled in the Army right out of high school. A year later he went to Afghanistan for the first time and this is when I felt the effects of war on family. During that time the news was constantly showing bombs exploding and the number counts of troops dead going up. I had anxiety in my life before this but it went 10x worse praying that I would never get the phone call that my brother was dead.

When was home a few years ago he came over and we talked about what he had seen and what he did. I never should have asked because I cried for days after he left. He told me how he was in a building when it was blown up, the look in his eyes when he said I had never been more scared in my life. Even though all he wanted to do was run after the building blew up he had to go back and make sure everyone was okay and help those who needed it. That's my job he said. He has always been my hero and those statements made it more so.

I don't watch the news anymore when he's gone. I can't do it. I look at his Facebook page, wait for him to post and know that he's okay. As much as I want to be mad at him for reenlisting, I know that he's right for the job.  He's so much more than a hero and he is good at his job. Even though he should be home with his family , he is out there protecting his fellow men and helping them stay alive. Those that don't make it he makes sure they are taken care of. The amount of death he has seen you would never be able to imagine. NEVER.

He lives out of state so I really really don't get to see him much. Korey is 10 months old and has never met my brother. It's things like that, that I hold onto to keep me strong and not breaking down. Last year there was a huge reward for each Airborne helicopter shot down in Afghanistan, yeah my brother is also jumps out of helicopters. He almost died in one of his practice jumps last year, but to know that there were people aiming to shoot down helicopters that he could have been in made me so sick.

I just want him home. I want him to meet Korey. I want to see him hold his children again, and kiss his wife. I want to see him safe. I just want him home. I love and miss you, my hero, my brother.

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  1. Hugs - I do not blame you. Tell your brother - BIG THANK YOU for his unselfishness and for defending our country. :)

  2. I can only imagine how difficult it must be for you. I would totally avoid the news also. You must be so very proud of your brave husband!

  3. Hugs. The best of luck to both of you