December 10, 2011

Why I Tear Up When TV Shows Feature Seizures

Yesterday I was watching the House when a nun had a seizure, and like I have for the past 2 years I teared up. Because it once happened to me.

I wasn't doing drugs, drinking, or anything funny at all. Here is what I remember. I was sitting in my computer chair and took a sip of water. It went 'down the wrong tube' and I started choking a little bit like people usually do. That's it. Then I woke up slowly to what felt like an earthquake and my boyfriend screaming my name. I was on the ground. I started freaking out thinking we were really having an earthquake till my boyfriend asked me are you okay? He was holding me with tears in his eyes.

It was then that I realized something had happened. Why the hell was I on the floor and why didn't I remember anything. Here is my boyfriend's story of what happened when that I do not remember. Immediately I fell to the ground and started having a seizure. My head and whole body was banging off the floor and he quickly went to the floor to try and hold me from hurting myself. He was screaming at me trying to get me to wake up and get out of the seizure. He sat that crying while he held me praying that I would be okay. Then I woke up.

After he told me what happened I started freaking out and crying. Saying I don't know what happened. I went to the doctor after that but not the ER like I should have. The doctor couldn't find anything wrong with me. I was extremely healthy just overweight. Until we moved out on our own my boyfriend couldn't look at the floor the same way. All he could remember is the love of his life seizing and not responding to him. I felt horrible for him having to go through that. I am so thankful though that he was there or things could have gotten worse.

It wasn't until I seen a TV episode showing seizures , which I have seen a million times but this was different now. Watching that seizure with different eyes now made me breakdown and cry. Being reminded how violent it was and how vulnerable and scared my boyfriend felt during it left me heartbroken. Something that happens all the time to people made me have a seizure. It CAN happen to ANYONE.

Now whenever someone chokes on liquid I always tell them to sit down. The closer you are to the ground if you go into a seizure the safer you are. After you have a seizure you NEED to go to the ER immediately. They will run a brain scan on you to make sure that everything is fine. I really don't want this to happen to anyone else.

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